So I’m off to the wedding of the century, where all bridesmaids will have the same dress, shoes, jewelry, make-up, hairstyle and for all I know UNDERWEAR (just kidding. She hasn’t asked us to buy matching underwear… yet…). My flight leaves in just more than 12 hours (so…early….), and all I have on my mind is… mimosa? or Bloody Mary?
Funny aside on the bridesmaid dresses – if you click the link above, you’ll read my husband’s response to the dress, but my brother-in-law’s reaction when my sister put hers on was priceless. “Don’t ever put that on in front of me again,” he said, and walked out of the room. She comforts herself with the fact that she’s likely to be three sheets to the wind the next time she puts the dress on.
I’ve already had two phone conversations from my packing sister (who currently lives in southern Florida but is moving to Pennsylvania a week from Saturday, crazy, I know), and because I am refusing to check luggage because I have to change planes and endure multiple-hour layovers because a certain airline stopped offering the direct flight I purchased on a nonrefundable ticket, she is agreeing to pack shareable girl items for me. Like shoes. And shampoo and conditioner. And a hair dryer. And maybe that kicky sweatsuit I’ve seen her wear. Yeah. Maybe I can borrow that for no good reason. All I can say, certain airline, is you better count your lucky starts I opted not to bring my toddler with me because you’d really be hearing it when I am stuck in the Atlanta (!! THE OPPOSITE WAY THAT I NEED TO TRAVEL!!) airport for four hours if I had a cranky, napless, hungry, tantrum-prone 17-month old child with me. As it is, you can content yourself with the one angry phone call you got already.
So wish me luck and hopefully I don’t trip in these teeny-bopper wedge heels we have to wear on Saturday. Because it will surely be the shoes and not the alcohol in the flask my sister got me for Mother’s Day that’s hidden in my bouquet. (Seriously. She got me a flask for Mother’s Day. I was joking about it in the earlier post, but she was dead serious. Is she great or what?)
Also, my brother plans to cut the cake with his new bride using a samurai sword. I’ll let you know how that one goes.
And look forward to a future post on boobs because I read Linda’s at All and Sundry and wanted to comment but she already had 62 comments and really, what’s the point?